How do you feel when there’s another woman achieving success right in front of your eyes? When was the last time you did something that made YOU feel good? What was the last thing you did today? Has there been anything in all these years that made you smile from the bottom of your heart?
Let me answer these questions one by one…
How do you feel when there’s another woman achieving success right in front of your eyes?
You pity yourself when you see another woman succeeding. No doubt it is quite difficult to attain success, but that doesn’t mean you can never achieve it. The other lady, with all due respect, must have strived hard for all that she has received today, but you can do it too, no matter how young or old you are. As long as you are alive and breathing, you know you can achieve all that you want to. However, you are unable to live your dreams. Why? Because you are living someone else’s dreams or are probably helping someone live HIS dreams, while you are back at home taking care of his parents and his family and even bearing the domestic violence.
When was the last time you did something that made YOU feel good?
You surely don’t remember the last time you did something for your happiness. When you were single and stayed with your parents, you sacrificed your happiness for the man of the house, your father; when you got married, you started wearing black pearls for the man you were ‘given’ to during Kanyadaan, your husband; now you have a wonderful son and your list of sacrifices is never-ending. You are even going through domestic violence.
Is it really worth all the sacrifices you are making?
What was the last thing you did today?
Let me make a wild guess… you probably cooked for your husband, dropped your kids to school, washed the utensils, vacuumed the floor or did a random thing to waste the talents you have in you; how do I know? Well, I did the same things a few years ago.
Has there been anything in all these years that made you smile from the bottom of your heart?
I am sure you have smiled… you smiled when your husband informed you about his new venture… you smiled when your son returned with a certificate or trophy in his hands… when your daughter complimented on the dinner you made, you smiled… but what did you do to make yourself smile?
‘My life is deeply connected to my husband and family and hence I am happy with whatever they do… I just want to be in the backend.’
If this is the statement you wish to throw at me here, then let me tell you – it is nothing but a random excuse and I am not accepting it.
Tolerating domestic violence and sacrificing your life won’t give you heaven.
And all the sacrifices for WHAT? To make your husband treat you like a random pet? To make your in-laws feel like they’ve got the best daughter in law in the world? Honestly, even if you burn your hands on the stove, cooking for them, they are never going to appreciate your work because according to them, you are doing what every daughter in law does.
“Darling lady reading this letter… if he is treating you like DIRT, if they are hurting your self-respect over and over again, if all you get in return to take care of him and his family is a bunch of complains, taunts, comparison and filthy remarks, then it is time for you to take a stand and say NO.”
The next time your husband tells you to quit your job… say NO…
The next time your boyfriend tells you to cook for him because that’s your job… say NO… he has not been raised with appropriate values and he may cause domestic violence in future…
The next time your son orders you to put food for him in his plate because his father has taught him that this is what women are made for… say NO…
The next time your daughter cries on your shoulder and asks you whether she should return to the man who has been hitting her with his belt… say NO… she doesn’t have to go through the domestic violence…
The next time your husband yells at you and asks if you are going to do everything according to his will and wish… say NO…
“I understand returning to your parents’ house is difficult for you, but if you don’t stand for yourself today, your daughter would never be able to stand for herself tomorrow. The worst is… your entire future generation will have to grind in the same old customs, traditions and cultures that are JUST MEANT FOR WOMEN.”
Realize your self-worth… you are a woman, you are the Devi. Awaken your Kundalini (I am not talking about the sexual energy here), strengthen your self-respect, adjust your crown and put yourself first. A single NO from your mouth can help your daughter learn her value; a NO from you can stop the hands of all those men and women, who have been hitting, abusing, taunting and burning thousands of daughters in law.; a single NO can help you get back the lost you.
Ladies… find your voices because it is finally the time for us to say…